Role Model

Okay
I am going to attempt to drown myself
You can try this at home
You can be just like me

Mic check 1, 2
We recording?
I'm cancerous
So when I dis you, you wouldn't want to answer this
If you responded back with a battle rap you wrote for Canibus
I strangled you to death and I choked you again
And break your fuckin' legs till your bones poke through your skin
You beef wit' me, I'm even the score equally
Take you on Jerry Springer, and beat your ass legally
I get too blunted off the funny home grown
'Cause when I smoke out I hit the trees harder than Sonny Bono
So if I said I never did drugs
That would mean i lie and get fucked more than the President does
Hillary Clinton tried to slap me and call me a pervert
I ripped her fuckin' tonsils out and fed her sherbet
My nerves hurt, and lately I'm on edge
Grabbed Vanilla Ice and ripped out his blond dreads
Every girl I ever went out with has gone les '
Follow me and do exactly what the song says
Smoke weed, take pills, drop outta school, kill people
And drink and jump behind the wheel like it was still legal
I'm dumb enough to walk in a store and steal
So I'm dumb enough to ask for a date wit' Lauryn Hill
Some people only see that I'm white, ignoring skill
'Cause I stand out like a green hat wit a orange bill
But I don't get pissed, y'all don't even see through the mist
How the fuck can I be white, I don't even exist
I get a clean shave, bathe, go to a rave
Die from an overdose and dig myself up out of my grave
My middle finger won't go down, how do I wave
And this is how I'm supposed to teach kids how to behave

Now follow me and do exactly what you see
Don't you want to grow up to be just like me
I slap women and eat shrooms then O.D.
Now don't you want to grow up to be just like me

Me and Marcus Allen went over to see Nicole
When we heard a knock at the door, must of been Ron Gold
Jumped behind the door, put the orgy on hold
Killed 'em both and smeared blood in a white Bronco
My mind won't work if my spine don't jerk
I slapped Garth Brooks out of his Rhinestone shirt
I'm not a player just a ill rhyme sayer
That'll spray an Aerosol can up in the ozone layer
My rap style's warped, I'm running out the morgue
Wit' your dead grandmother's corpse then throw it on your porch
Jumped into a chicken hawk cartoon with a cape on
And beat Fog Horn Leghorn with an acorn
I'm bout as normal as Norman Bates, wit' deformative traits
A premature birth that was four minutes late
Mother are you there, I love you
I never meant to hit you over the head wit that shovel
Will someone explain to my brain
That I just severed a main vein
With a chainsaw and I'm in pain
I take a breather and sigh
Either I'm high, or I'm nuts
'Cause if you ain't even in this room neither am I
So when you see your mom with a thermometer shoved in her ass
Then It's probably obvious that I got it on with her
'Cause when I drop it off with this solo shit it's over with
I bought cages tape opened it and dubbed over it

I came to the club drunk with a fake I-D
Don't you want to grow up to be just like me
I've been with ten women who got H-I-V
Now don't you want to grow up to be just like me
I got genital warts and it burns when I pee
Don't you want to grow up to be just like me
I tied a rope around my penis then I jumped from a tree
You probably want to grow up and be just like me